the sham wow guy got arrested for beating up a hooker.
She was not exactly lady-like. Down there.
after taking her first shot and having her first random hook up she finally feels like she is ready for college
she has no idea
Outta milk. Using rum instead for pancake mix. Drunk Thursday is a gooo
You're in the clear; you and Andrew did not joint fingerbang that girl on the dance floor last night.
Yours weakened by children. Mine weakened by a forearm sized cock for 8 years.
The drunk mom in a firefighter hat just told her to leave.
I can't wait til I'm a real grown up and am no longer expected to take 7 shots of raspberry ruby as a pregame to a night of drinking natty lite
Hot dogs and hydrocodine is NOT the combo of champions
sex, shower, sex, ice cream sandwiches?
All im saying is that my face might fall off.
DAMN HIS BEARD AND ABILITY TO USE TOOLS ON A LADDER!!
Oh my god I need an adult
Wait shit I am an adult
I woke up in the middle of the night on all fours turning circles in my bed! No more patron for me!
She asked me if I could do that to her every single time. I said nope. sometimes it's better.
Randomize
