Gonna be late. Someone jumped in front of our train.
i have nine cents in my fucking bank account... not even a dime
Was just hit on by a guy with 2 kids and one was named Rocky. I need to get out of Buena Park.
I just got a rly sharp new razor and was shaving down there...
and?
RIP clitoris
I think I'm maturing; i was gonna watch porn and then take a nap but i motivated myself to put my laundry in first.
How long do you need to date somebody until it is acceptable to fart in their presence?
The real question is how long do you need to date them to dutch oven them?
I just made a milkshake without a blender... thats determination
Sitting on an airplane reeking of booze, sex and shame while surrounded by families coming home from Disney. This is not one of my finer moments.
I don't like getting sloppy drunk but I don't like getting just half drunk either, I'm way too responsible if my blood alcohol level is below 0.2
Turns out the guy I peed on gave me a ride back to my dorm this morning.
You are a god.
I know I've become a responsible adult because this time, I'm not going to do the drugs I found on the ground
he brings me coffee and gets a blow job. not sure if I trained him or he trained me or it's simply mutually beneficial beautiful.
Fuck the library it's too quiet and makes me uneasy. I feel like I'm so isolated I should take off my pants or something
There was puke outside of my classroom and lecture was half empty. Damn thirsty thursday is intense
when i saw him today i think my vagina did the equivalent of a stomach growl... its been to long
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