I like the name aiden. he likes stella. I told him they're coming out of my vagina, and I will name them what I damn well please. Stella goes.
proudest moment: just made a guy walk into a parked car with his mouth hanging open cause of the shirt im wearing.
Just realized my talking to the tv hockey voice is same as my sex voice. Life just got a whole lot weirder.
in case you havent found it already in honor of Toy story 3 we wrote ANDY on the bottom of your foot while you were passed out on the couch.
then again I'm sitting on a tree stump completely naked in the dark listening to some type of glee soundtrack.
can't make this up: he's writing lyrics for the musical reenactment of how he met her @ an anime convention to perform at their wedding. yes, there'll also be dance routines involved.
I've realized that my life is in no way structured to be compatible with monogamy. I'm not adjusting to this well.
Using the salt from a pretzel bag for tequila shots. Come over.
Facebook stalking ex-girlfriends who went to rehab. This is my life.
The fact that there are multiple ex-girlfriends who have been to rehab concerns me
I just want to have such an intense orgasm that my heart stops and I die. I mean that would kind of suck for the guy I'm fucking but then again he could be like "I'm that good"
I dont even think your gonna like what I got you for christmas. If not we can take it back and get drugs.
I've been to his house multiple times since that night and I STILL can't find my bra. And he says the hot tub ate my thong.
We have moved from phase 1: honeymoon, to phase 2: trapped in relationship until the cold embrace of death
I’m pregaming Christmas shopping with grandma. What’s up?
I was trying to get nudes from last night and ended up getting a family portrait!
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