I tried karate at age 7 and quit after realizing it conflicted with watching new episodes of "Full House."
worse things have happened to me. but if it will make you feel better you can pay for my therapist sessions next week.
do herpes really smell.
I just did my online traffic school at the bar. No biggie.
you were mass sexting so we took your phone away
Evidently I told a girl she should leave the bar because no one wanted to fuck her.
Now that I'm hitting my bong, I realized I haven't missed something so much in a long time. I love Thomas the Dank Engine.
I don't know what it was about last night, but every bar that i went to there was at least one girl there that i had done something with. I'm sure the girl that i went with knew because they all grabbed my penis and told me to call them.
They kept barging in on us saying random shit. At one point they came in yelling room service! and threw soda at us bruising my foot. Weirdest injury I have gotten during sex.
We got buck wild in our animal onesies last night. You kept ripping off your tail in angry rages.
He just sent me the contact information about getting the Zebra for graduation...
After walking ten blocks barefoot in Boston I've concluded drunk me needs to make better decisions.
How drunk you think somebody has to be, that they think that putting out a profile pic like that can be even a slightly good idea?
Hey do you care to explain why there are 3 empty pickle jars next to me when I woke up or do I even wanna know?
It's a shame I've been hooking up with him for 6 months and he still doesn't know my real name.
Randomize
