I dont need to watch it. And stop comparing your life to Entourage.
walked right past julianne moore (on her walk of shame this morning) god i love new york. :)
we're doing shots for every degree below freezing it is outside
She made me put my jeans under her mattress so that I wouldn't leave in the morning while she was still sleeping. Apparently I just look like "that guy".
drinking out of a sandbucket again
Hes sobering up now. He was just really bad for like 45 minutes. He cried while he was telling me how he pictured us eating hotdogs on the beach together..
Disregard that. She just puked into her boot and started screaming.
good, we got high then went swimming. shelly forgot to keep swimming so we tied her to the ladder in the shallow part with her bikini top.
I've slowly been stuffing french fries down his pants. I'm at 31 and he hasn't even noticed.
Year anniversary in a month. Think I'll just give him a COME ON MY FACE FREE card. I'm both broke and shameless.
Cookies. Watch out fir falling satellites.
Just rolled up to a matinee showing of THE HOBBIT. At the dollar theater. Alone. In sweats. With a fifth of sunnybrook and leftover pizza in a ziplock. There's a dude here in cape with his elderly mother. I'm handling this breakup FIIIIIINE.
And then we will celebrate by drinking and making fun of him. As per usual.
Bro you were on fire last night...like a less Irish version of Liam Neeson
Dude, I'm pretty sure I just drank iced tea last night and yet I'm still hungover. What the fuck is my body anymore ?
Randomize
