I'm laying in your front yard are you home
Wine smoothie.... Not as good as I thought it would be
Just woke up. My philosophy paper is a play, and my paper for musical theater is about physics. That's some dank shit you sold me
It's official, I've know hooked up with everyone I carpooled with in middle school
someone wrote "the short drunk lives here" on our door. i already have a reputation
i'm only riding in the trunk because they put the case of beer back here..
Speaking of testosterone. I saw a girl with a moustache thicker than one I can grow last night...
Fuck Sunday funday. Fuck real pants. Fuck the sun. Fuck Jameson. Fuck my life. Yes, I am hungover as shit sitting in my office eating bacon.
it wasnt a pity fuck per say. i wasnt attracted to her, but still thought 'that looks like a fun ride'
Would you mind pretending to be lesbians just for like three emails?
What alcohol should i drink Saturday to completely hate life?
I told him I wanted to get on him and ride him to Montana. It didnt end like i thought it would.
What? No, wine isn't my weakness, I just love it.
Here's a rundown of my night alone. Danced my ass off in the kitchen to FleetmacWood. Drank a little bit. Ordered $40 worth of Chinese food once the drinks kicked in. Picked up said Chinese in dirty sweatpants and slippers. #livinglife
It's magical, I'm just dancing. It's like prom but by myself and with less clothes.
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