Do you have a straightener and are extra lubricated condoms not the norm?
Mines from giving head on hardwood floors.
Well that's not true. She had two social skills. She kept them in her bra
Let's just say there's a reason that "suede" rhymes with "laid".
He said he's was gunna give me some pain meds. I'm not sure what they are but I just gave him a thumbs up
ok... i just had to be reminded that people in animal costumes were feeding me shots at the bar.
yea last night was a repeat of newyears...exept this time it ivolved a fish costume, throw up, a hole in the roof, and cops...lots of cops
Oh my god what did I do. My hands are scraped, there are pickles on the floor, my clothes are wet, and I don't remember how I get here. Thank you.
All I could think when I saw it was, "All right, Vagina, only one of us is getting out of this alive."
Joined a porch party below me by climbing out the window and jumping off the roof. Tonight will be good
I love you too! Remember NO alcohol or weed at my residence because of legal ramifications.
I'd google it, but I don't really want my search history to say, "Name for masturbating on a flight."
She'll feel so accomplished if she finally gets to bang me.
Did I see you at the bar last night?
Yes. You just kept grabbing my boobs and saying how much better they are than yours...
thank you for being so understanding of my weak stomach and poor self-control
Randomize
