What can I expect? While all of my friends are getting married, all of his friends are tripping on robitussin
I'll listen to your side of the story when you stop being such a whore.
So she said she wears a diaper when she's on her period and I'm not going to lie, I kind of want to see the diaper.
I Apparently saved a picture of the Eiffel tower in between 2 pics of his dick. It appears to be the same size. I fucking love Paris.
Once two people had broken bones it had become a bulk hospital trip so we took the party bus
Oh my god. He likes it up the butt. But loves womanly support. Omg. Its bad. Its bad. Ive had too much whiskey for this to be ANYthing except bad.
my boss just accepted "because it's 4/20" as a legitimate reason to take Friday off
You me handle of captain and a sorostitute study sesh, if we don't get laid mancards must be relinquished
It's like a booty call, except its for tacos...and you're my brother.
jake and the teradactyl broke up, operation get high and find him a new girl who hasn't had sexual experiences with three delts simultaniously is in full effect.
I started scrolling back in our texts looking for context and a picture of your dick rose like the Great Pumpkin in the middle of my screen.
You went in the back with her.. And honestly I couldn't tell her neck from her tits man..
I'm a bit broke right now... Would it be OK if I pay you in champagne and Xanax?
Have you ever looked at someone and thought…oh honey, you're too pretty for an ankle monitor
So some guy thought I took second place in a male stripper competition
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