Yeah. I woke up naked in his bed this morning and remember saying "Get a condom cuz I can't afford an abortion right now" last night. He didn't run. He's a keeper
no.. I went home. Puking up hot dogs and lemon tart isn't as lovely as it sounds.
when a girl feels in her heart, the way she feels in her vagina, anything is possible.
We literaly had to peel your fingers off the jose cuervo bottle and lock it in someones room
the cops who came hadnt heard yet. when we told them they sang the star spangled banner with us
You came in as I got off work, ordered us jack and cokes. Put them on my tab, and then proceeded to fall asleep on the bar.
We just ended up getting drunk and doing field sobriety tests on each for practice... No one remembers who passed.
I don't remember anything that happened last night past 10.. I made him buy me a Buckeye's Donut tshirt. I have no idea why he'd want to fuck me after that.
Do not deep throat a rocket pop, it WILL go into your lungs, and you may die.
First stoner thought of the day: Life would be so much better if there were more things that were biscuits and gravy flavored.
You don't have issues. You're a consenting adult having sex at work. Go you.
IT IS NICKEL SHIT NIGHT
*shot. Why
I have done everything sexualally imaginable with that umpalumpa
do you know of a way I can die but like NOT die? like not being unconcious, just ascending to an astral plane for a few weeks or months in real world time so i can sort my issues out away from the rigors of life kinda deal, you know?
Not sure if I should ask if I can have my underwear back or just avoid that all together.
Randomize
