This chick, for whatever reason, has serious "Leave your wife and kids and also break up her young marriage in order to frolick for a good 2 weeks before I realize that she's just like the rest of them and I made a huge mistake and ruined a lot of lives in the process" potential. It's SO INTRIGUING.
She made fun of how I walked so I announced to her boyfriend that I have cum on her face before.
just had dinner with my dad's new gf and her daughter.. had to drink a beer to get through it.. she's 19 she has on a disney watch and snowflake earrings
Hhahaha he is. Omg the new polish friend just took his pants off in front of me. There is something wrong with this nationality.
my greatest accomplishment from the city of diplomacy is that i puked at a table of 5 diplomats and my professor and NONE OF THEM NOTICED
I don't know. I was also picked up by the doormen and held over the bar so I could do an upside down shot out of a bartenders tits.
This inappropriate post strip club text brought to you by Cheetah of Palm Beach and vodka. Blowjob in the champagne room and the clap for the low low price of your paycheck.
P.s. remind me to tell you about the porno that Paul envisioned starring you. It's wizard of oz themed.
Don't talk to me about scholarly dedication until you've taken a final in boxers, a bloody tank top and a zip tie to hold your hair back. I wear the most sullied 4.0 crown of all time....
When he couldn't get it up, he handed me a beer, put his clothes back on, and said "try again tomorrow."
If I spent my amateur stripper money does that mean I am cleansed of my sins?
I'm not sure. But he has a pet sugar glider. So, points either way
As long as that's not his name for his dick.
Knowing that porn stars want to fall in love is the weirdest thing I've found to be beautiful recently. I'm so lonely.
I have to choose between charging my phone or my vibrator. This is bullshit.
Little does she know that you've out-sourced your conscience to a girl who doesn't even wear pants on a regular basis
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