Will you still be my friend if I read and enjoyed Twilight?
No
Hey its my first time.
I think you mean "it's my first time"
a man that wears gold spandex underwear and party boys other people is a man after my own heart.
No. I still stand by my previous statement that nachos and tequila is the breakfast of champions.
Woke up and went out for a cigarette and it was dead quiet. It was like the world just knew how many mistakes were made last night.
dude,it's memorial day.not getting wasted=you're a terrorist
We're so stoned that were both cuddling on the couch and crying over Forest Gump while eating popcorn. She asked me if I'd fuck away the sadness. I think she's serious.
He was "hot guy in the dark". One of us had to sleep with him. I took the bullet you're welcome.
The bathroom smells like ribs. What did you do?
Remember the thing I sent you? "Often complex problems are best solved by thinking like an animal." Hump away!
She deliberately backed into the homewrecker's whoremobile and yelled ""FOR SPARTA!"
There's no good way to say, "sorry your son saw me naked on top of your brother"
In other news my pubic hair is covered in glitter.
Too stoned. Randomly can't get the image of Emilio estevez's smiling face out of my head. What is life.
I asked you why you bought a sword and you then replied with the greek alphabet and then tried to assure me that samurais are apart of greek life.
Randomize
