i feel like im playing gay clue. i have to figure out where i am, who took me home, and what he put in me
yeah but it's new years. they should arrest people for being sober that day.
When did we start counting Thursdays as weekends?
When we got our fake ids in grade 11, why?
I just feel like it's time to start counting wednesdays as well...
Today in class was pretty awsome. I dont feel like i have to throw up and im actually paying attention. This is a first for friday
tonight i'm going for the "i fuck with the lights on" look
Any idea who the guy in my bed tagged as rattlesnake dick might be?
The last thing I said to him last night before telling him he couldn't give me a kiss goodnight was pointing at his dick then at me and saying "this isn't working out"
She tried to sit inside the drawer to my dresser and when it broke, she burst into tears calling herself fat. Too high to deal with this
Gonna send a picture of my negative pregnancy test with the message "Merry Christmas" to the guys I've been sleeping with. That alone, will put a huge dent in my shopping list of gifts for people.
Dude I just ripped my new jeans climbing out the window so his booty call wouldn't realize I was home. Being his roommate should come with hazard pay
Hi future me, I saved you a big mac under the bed.
This is John, I met you downtown last night.
Oh, ok.
This is the cop that kept you out of trouble last night
Woke up with two different flip flops on sum burnt at the beach. Who are these French kids plz come back
My TA is here with a sombrero and an entire bottle of Svedka. Skip jury duty.
I haven't showered. And am sitting in the office smelling like a beer can someone's been using as an ash tray.
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