I may have been to starbucks and 2 classes with balls still written on my face...
hahaha my homeschooled cousin put up graduation pictures. it's just her standing in front of her fire place. With a hand made diploma.
The last thing i remember is saying breakfast beer and carrying the keg to my room and locking the door.
This would be a good time for the don't get drunk and bang a married chick pep talk...
Call me as soon as you're able to dial a phone. I just took a shit behind a building in broad daylight and need to get the fuck outta here soon.
There's a man in a pumpkin/reaper outfit advertising a new head shop outside the Taco Bell. I love this town.
Siri just called me GayBoy in front of my family. I will destroy you.
Hey I came back and we made joints with the breathalyzers the cops left last night.
I won't be able to get a boner for a month
Challenge accepted.
Ran out of plates, so I'm using my sociology notes. Looks like they will finally have a practical use.
I left when you were using your mug to lay on the street and ask for spare change
Found the cure to anxiety attacks.
An orgasm
Got her pregnant in a minivan. Circle of life.
Your vagina must be outstanding or have a secret entrance to Narnia if someone is will to fly from Texas for one night of it.
It was like he was 23 all over again. Madness. I. was. so. scared.
Randomize
