I had a new years resolution not to be a whore anymore, but I think I'm gonna wait till 2011
This girl brought half a watermelon to class. I want to be on her level.
Dude she threw his clothes out n 8th floor window and her dog tried to bite his dick off. So the answer is yes it could be worse...
chugging beers on the train. people are staring. I would be offended if it wasn't 8:30
I was so intoxicated last night I was giving out my real name and number ugh.
He stopped mid-sex to read the subtitles on a Korean movie we had playing in the background.
So I feel like I should have had a going away party for your dick. Complete with balloons and cake. Yeahh that's right. I'm gonna miss it.
It has been so long since I got any action that I have decided to change my vagina's name from "the chamber of judgement" to "the cave of forgotten dreams".
Just when I thought he had turned a new leaf, I see a "Let me get you pregnant" shirt in his closet
im In safeway buying a bottle of Ciroc in short shorts at 3:00 pm on a Monday, yeah I don't know either.
I miss her, but also fucked her ex boyfriend.... So there's that
Yeah you burned that bridge with your vagina
Today I learned that when you lick a mans butthole, you get wined and dined at a nice french restaurant.
YO. MCGRIDDLES.
It's official. Post baseball sex is better than post hockey sex. I hope the Blue Jays win the world series.
Does your drug dealer have a printer I can use??
Randomize