I mean, you're like my second best best friend we're so close I can't believe you'd do that to me
Canada is now making docos about life in America. Its called Trailer Park Boys.
Holy shit. Do you realize what this means? Officially all of my ex-bfs are either dead or gay
If its allowed to Tornado at 830am then Im allowed to have a beer and a cigarette at 830am
Dude that musta been some handjob last night. The sound of her pandora bracelet kept waking me up
12 trash cans filled with water. Beer cans floating in each, 12 ft apart. Dodgeball. Ultimate beer pong.
Rules. We have to wear superhero outfits
98% is good enough for me. Kinda like birth control. Worth the risk
My team for a project is gonna have weekly meetings at a bar. yessss. they will do all the work while i thor hammer down beers.
The impromptu 'dance party' was just three white dudes flailing arrhythmically in the kitchen in absolute silence. Stone cold sober.
You're the only guy I know who could convince a lady at the pharmacy to trade you her pain pills for your antibiotics.
I'm going to need a penis the size of a bat
Eating breakfast at 1:30 in the afternoon stark naked is how everyone should live
I'm not wearing pants, but I'm wearing a tiara.
He woke up wondering who broke in and rearranged all the furniture. He reviewed 11 hours of security footage before I told him he did it while whiskey-drunk.
true. but still. you know how big of a sucker i am for a penis and a pretty face.
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