White coat. Heels.
TLC. RIGHT NOW. PRIMORDIAL TODDLERS.
I'm pretty sure there is a country song about this exact situation
I have on cowboy boots and a ten gallon hat. I'd say I'm a little past tipsy
She needs to learn she only fits into our friendship as a DD.
Why is everyone in the bowling alley looking at me like i'm a prostitute just because I have bunny ears on?
So far we've hooked up on a pool table, on a public bathroom counter and now in a little league baseball dugout. We haven't even made to a house yet.
God she is annoying. I am only keeping her around on fb because I want to see if her baby comes out looking like an alien or not.
No, trust me. Falling down the stairs is a fucking sobering experience.
second roommate of the year to get clamydia. go life.
So do you want to be the old guy picking up a girl in a mini skirt who may be slightly buzzed before noon from college, or shall i walk over?
rock bottom is drinking straight vodka from a protein shaker, singing one direction and crying alone in your room. exams.
I opened the door, threw up on the street, wiped my mouth and flashed a thumbs up to all of the cars behind us and kept on driving
I offered to trade my cat for a bottle of tequila as long as it had a handle on it and realized I had a problem
I love you so much and not just because your dick is perfect
Randomize