Is your delayed response due to the massive amount of judging going on?
I walked in on him shirtless licking the mirror while talking to his reflection. So yes, I definitely want to do shrooms the next time you get them.
And we hooked up in the carwash. I told you our creative juices were flowing today.
she's doing key bumps of parmesean cheese
Btw. Made out with a random kid at a frat. It's all good though. He invited us to his frat party tomorrow so yay! For having plans!
I think he's in need of mouth to penis resuscitation. Which I happen to be certified
Never visiting again. You guys drink like immortals
You talked about giving to sperm banks on a first date. What did you expect?
Volunteering at a homeless shelter a bum asked if he could lick me cause I still reeked of whiskey. Being a bumsickle=epic hangover
you said "this ones for the homies" and proceeded to pour the shot into your other cup instead of the ground b/c "good liquor is not meant to wasted no matter the circumstances"
no body wants to do anything today cause it's too cold, but a guy can only masturbate so many times a day. Ya know
Did you know that pizza hut has a wedding proposal box? And sorry for being kinda drunk yesterday when you got here
This is not the first time I've recognized my body is subconsciously trying to make pizza.
He got me to hold his phone, wallet, keys and pants while he hooked up with another girl.
He was so wasted he lit his sink on fire with shit he found in his room....it was smokeless. Chemistry majors drunk = the coolest shit ever.
Randomize
