so ur a construction worker, male escort, sex god and surfer? lol
well its been awhile since I've surfed
dude, you're being a jerk.
sorry, didn't mean to pull a Cheney
The girl in the car behind me just took a bowl hit. I miss college.
I'm fucking him on the second date. I don't give a fuck what Patti Stanger says.
Does the phrase 'traumatizing near-threesome' mean anything to you.
I just banged two guys while dressed like an angel. I love this holiday.
You don't take my phone while I'm passed out, have a three hour conversation on it with Dealer Dave, set up a date with him and NOT TELL HIM THAT HE'S NOT TALKING TO ME.
Just walked into a random hotel for the free breakfast. How was your night?
Dont really know what happened near the end, Pockets were filled with skittles though
WHY IS FOOD SO DELICIOUS
BECAUSE SCIENCE
ditto.
about cumming, not toast
I keep finding Kraft singles in his pockets. Honestly, this is the weirdest family I've ever worked for.
I said I wanted pizza tattoo on my ass and the tattooist asked me what I wanted on it.
I would offer you moral support, but I have questionable morals..
He was a half hour late. His excuse was that his brother knifed him right before he was going to leave. I didn't believe him until I saw the gauze.
Randomize