fuck, i never want to drink again I drunk dialed matt last night and broke up with him the second night in a row. FUCK QUADFEST
dude this 15 year old girl saw our youtube vid and just facebook messaged me saying i was verry verry pretty. i have no schemas for how to respond to this situation.
woah 15?
i know! what is this dateline?
He asked about stds. I told him I don't have any... which I don't. They are now called sti's. Whooopsie
she was screaming in french about how classy it was to be drinking wine. oh... she was drinking it out of the bottle. with a beer in her other hand while throwing up.
she would only give me a road handjob because she didnt want to unbuckle
safety first
Then he wanted a handjob in the car. While my cousin was driving. To krispy kreme. And there was someone else in the backseat.
Jesus...So southern.
Curled up in the fetal position, trying not to throw up or think about my future, and humming songs from musicals to myself. You?
He's sweet and rough. A wonderful contradiction. He's the starburst of sex.
Probably TMI here but I just rubbed one out while listening to thunderstruck, almost ripped my dick off.
They were so huge my eyes were just drawn to them. Boob gravity man.
Our host-mom was rubbing her back sympathetically going "muy bien, chica" while she puked on the beach. So yeah, I think we got the best one.
When you're not at your house I assumed you're somewhere having sex
Please remind me next time not to call the ex who cheated on me to cry about the ex who forgave me for putting him in prison. It would be much appreciated.
Ok sry I left that ambiguous......did you want contact solution or fellatio?
college girl with braces trying to flirt with you...time to go
Randomize
