why do all canadians talk like horny gerbils are stuck in their throats?
From what I remember, he had one ball. But it was cute
All I know is that we apparently made a drink we named The Single Girl which is rum, vodka, grain alcohol, and sprite and rolled around in the backyard.
Passed out in a rocking chair on her porch. Woke up to the tow truck taking away my car.
I woke up in the closet and then I found my shirt in a bag of Doritos... how does that work out?
I've reached too hung over to move status will you bring me something to drink?
I moved out 2 weeks ago remember?
Can you ship it to me then?
We just set the fire alarm off with a fog machine. What's my first instinct? Finish my drink. I think I handled that correctly.
corona bottle fell out of my backpack and broke in the middle of my physics midterm. yay me.
do you remember in the middle of fleeing from the cops you stopped in the middle of the road to make out with quail man?
It turns out my English teacher used to pose for Playboy. She's an inspiration.
Best ethics paper a stoner could write. I called my professor Dr. Superfly Arandia. And I'm pretty sure I used "respect the hustle" somewhere in there too.
We're too hungover to prance.
I've never seen so much of my blood outside me. After the initial shock it was kind of cool.
I think I left my thong in your bed. Careful. It has the power to destroy the agitator on a washing machine
Thank you for stopping me from getting a butt tattoo. That was a good call.
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