so explain again why im purple
no
we are all sexual creatures
yea maybe. but you're not. you're not getting any.
well, if it gives you any insight into how crazy it was, i am currently wikipediaing "anullment"
hey i know this is weird but does alcohol affect pregnancy tests?
It's either jizz or frosting, and either way, someone's being held accountable.
oh but the power of the cock will take you to places you never been..i flew to hawaii once to sleep witha chick
Did you ever stop and think that god invented whiskey dick specifically for me
There is not enough soap in the world to make me feel clean after last night. Im gonna need jesus for this one
Yeah play it cool maybe put in a kissy face though let him know you're giving an invitation for his dick
I ate the crust off the pizza and left the rest in the box. Even I would hate me.
Do you think there are other mothers looking at porn in the carpool line?
WAIT MOM THIS DOESNT NEED TO BE A FAMILY EVENT OK AARON DOESNT NEED TO BE AROUND FOR NIPPLEGATE 2014
Why can I remember how tall Nicki Minaj is from looking up her height once months ago, yet after weeks into the semester I can't even remember where any my classrooms are located
Importance
Once someone takes a shit in your toilet they are no longer a guest.
Rationing the toilet paper. Only one wipe allowed. I'm scared to move too much.
Randomize
