I think youre just another guy trying to take advantage of a young naive innocent girl
you're not innocent... Once you have taken it in the turd cutter you can't label yourself innocent.
I woke up in my girlfriends bed with another guy laying next to me. wtf.
I can't believe all I ate yesterday was half a turkey sandwich and 20 finger licks of exctasy.
made out with three guys on the first night of college orientation, just imagine what joys all of next year will hold
Wake up, take the dog to the trails, puke in the woods. More days should start like this.
as soon as I stop standing here with one leg up on my bathroom counter admiring my balls, I'm going to go tan. and then you may come over.
I don't drink so I see St. Patty's as an LSD type of day. Its like a more hardcore 420
Why are you awake at 6am and liking photos from rando Russian chicks on Instagram?
She had a tattoo on her pelvis that said "it's cock-o-clock" an had clocks and hot dogs exploding away from it. I'd like to tell you it was deal breaker buuuuuuut.......
Have bite marks on my arm where my temporary tat was Saturday night. Did someone try to bite Captain America or something?
One of the many mysteries surrounding the weekend...
Maybe she'll change her mind but the "go fuck yourself" doesn't seem promising
OH MY GOD REMEMBER ALL THAT I LOVE NEW YORK I DVRED BECAUSE I JUST DID
Whose dick am I looking at? There are too many possibilities at the moment.
how do you know everyone's mad at you?
I just woke up feeling shameful
These random guys found me. They told me not to wander in the woods and i remember saying 'am i fucking Bambi?! I'm not gonna walk into woods!' then i threw up.
Randomize