She said her name was "party"
i just used a pokemon card to do blow. i need an adult. now.
she was like a sexier Rosie O'Donnel
how can getting a pizza be this hard?
when you've been drinking 14 hours anythings impossible
I went to his work to give him some blankets and ended up blowing him in the bathroom. See what happens when you don't come over?
Kinda felt bad though cuz she whimpered and shuttered a lot, i felt like i was kicking a puppy, only the puppy liked it and came a bunch
I'm okay.. I had a good heart to heart with the cab driver Raheem - it's going to be our year.
I'm not going to need your "it doesn't mean you're a slut" pep talk after all.
Looks like a significant portion of my drinking money just became legal fees.
Maybe I don't remember every single thing... I think there's a hi lighter treasure map drawn on my arm...
I just found it. I hope it leads to food.
Im rolling a blunt of encouragement for you to return to
shes making a cheerios necklace using dental floss 'just in case' she gets the munchies later
You're an independent woman who is defined by her own actions and not by whether or not you have a man. You also have great tits.
Sooo i'm debating posing nude for the drawing and painting classes, I just wanna see if they draw my nip ring.
found a note from drunk me saying "don't worry i fed the mice". WHAT MICE?
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