I've been reduced to Capt. Morgan and Golden Girls reruns. Ugh.
its like think what a normal person would think but completely the opposite.
Yeah! I got cockblocked by the blizzard last night. Lost girl on way to my apartment. Not a joke
Shark Week. Kick off begins Sunday. The drinking game has been upgraded to include jumping/breaching sharks and Jake's not allowed to bring the harpoon. Period.
He's only a little bit crosseyed.
I think this is one situation where "a little bit" doesn't mean much.
What's the best way to say, "it's too early in our relationship to leave me at your place alone"? Steal something?
No, listening to the fray and drinking a bottle of jack daniels does not count as counseling
I just took my birth control with a water bottle I found in my purse with vodka in it in Spanish class. 10am is still too early for me.
Your lack of dedication to alcohol is forcing me to drink with my ex husband. U suck
when your 30 and im 37 and we're lonely and single, lets make a pact to murder each other.
sometimes u just have to say fuck it and help a straight sixteen year old break into her uncles gay bar.
We used a snorkel as a funnel. Can you say desperate?
Do you guys think there will be a coke-for-Molly barder at bonnaroo?
Omg cinnamon bun Oreos. Thanks weed
dude can you explain to me why i woke up on your sisters floor with moutain dew and chips everywhere
i dont know im at your house.
Randomize