Can i come over
After you called me a desperate slut? No
Come over
I'm just looking at Lindsay Lohan's vagina.
Oh yea! I was just doing that too!
We went to the police station completely hammered looking for you. Don't tell me I'm not a good friend.
dude they were twins that means they were both only 17
He then proceeded to tell me about his enlarged lymph nodes, his"severe" case of blue balls.
Before I dignify that with an answer, let me get this straight. You're asking me if I wiped my ass on the towels?
Rent Disney Oceans. Smoke a bowl. Fast forward to the seal section. Then call me.
We both paused during sex to do the clap during the Friends theme song. Soulmates.
I was getting sick from all the peanut butter I had to lick off
Stop bitching. YOU SHOULD FEEL BLESSED TO HAVE LICKED PEANUT BUTTER OFF OF THESE TOTTERS
He just told me what he wants for his birthday. "a noise complaint" he also said he wants to be the cause of all the noise but he won't be the one making the noise.
Just like to put it out there it's surprising how little reception a dog cage has
We created a neighborhood watchdog drinking game
stoners and superglue do NOT mix
I can't control his boners. I can only encourage them.
Everything is scary i hate being an adult i hate responsibility tell me a dick joke
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