um. i met him on myspace...we text now, he lives down the street
I showed my boss the "She Wolf" video. He sent it to all his friends and told me to make us martinis...thanks Shakira and keep it up
I can't wait until weight watchers comes out with a beer
My dick just stopped my iPhone from falling into the toilet.
He showed up to fuck me at the same time the pizza guy did. It was like everything I needed just showed up at my stoop.
Then I hope you find a set of extremely intelligent, flexible triplets in the ethnicity of your choice.
That is the nicest thing anyone has ever wished for me
Just woke up. Naked. Under an animal pelt. With a girl. I've never met her. She's pretty naked too.
Definitely! I will do that this week. Right now, watching drag queens play with my dad's beard.
Yeah. I woke up in an awkward three way spoon with him and his sister. Tequila!
I appreciate having someone to objectively critique my dick pics.
I can see their wedding vows now: 'Til basicness do us part
I would be down to associate sex w taco bell
You should of known that i was high if i refer to myself as melting into anything
....even the bartender was embarrassed for her
I came home and drank a bottle of wine in the bathtub. I have AMAZING coping skills!!
Randomize
