Dude i just saw JT leaving the hospital. He drove there to get fluids because he was too drunk, so they hooked him up to an IV so he didn't get alcohol poisoning. Did I mention he drove there? Oh yea and our roommates in the hospital with alcohol poisoning, she just puked up coal. So many ppl are here, it's like a hospital party, I love spring quarter!
she said it was ok for her to take her top off in the hot tub but she didn't take off her bottoms because that would be slutty
I spent my night drunkenly staring at a picture of John Stamos. How do you think I feel?
Ok Ghana you win again. Tell you what...Double or nothing over women's tennis, basketball, hockey, war, baseball, golf, swimming, diving, oil spills, box office proceeds, internet porn sites, criminals incarcerated, women's downhill, bass fishing, NASCAR, or GDP?
The thing is you're all "holy crap this isn't nearly as bad as I thought pissing on my own face would be."
I think you'll appreciae more than anyone that I'm renting my parking spot out for a half gallon of vodka a month.
Don't feel bad, we're professionals and we just housed burgers in burger king singing I believe I can fly
We shot off some fireworks at 12 and then I orchestrated the group singing of god bless the USA all while wearing a don't tread on me flag as a cape. I repped hard.
... I threw up in the shower this morning
You were "I'm not drunk" drunk.
I was feeling sad so bedroom vodka seemed like the best solution at the time.
I almost spit out my drink. But only almost, because it was vodka. And you don't spit out vodka.
She just texted me apologizing for taking selfies on my phone then asked me to send them to her
I really don't want to get drunk alone tonight. Like, I'll do it, but I won't enjoy it.
I DID NOT GO INTO HOURS OF STRENUOUS LABOR FOR YOU TO LOOK LIKE A DOMINATRIX BARMAID ON A WEEKDAY. AT LEAST SAVE IT FOR THE WEEKEND GDI.
no we just smoked too much weed and listened to the tarzan soundtrack. phil collins is amazing
One of these days I would like to go out drinking and stick to plan of just getting drunk and not be sidetracked with other people's plans of doing drugs along the way. I didn't even want to not feel my teeth tonight but here we go just another Thursday night when you live I live
Randomize
