I woke up to a text that said "You're a fucking asshole" Why is she so pissed at me?
Im guessing it has something to do with running up to her boyfriend screaming "THIS IS SPARTA" and kicking him in the balls.
Is that considered a cock block?
hammered. By myself. Accident. Faillll. Snowwwwwy
the only muscles i have these days is kegels
Haha I will however wear glass and and draw a lightning bolt scar if you want to have sex that way, and that can be the only time you can call me Harry.
I know this request is pointless but you two please try to keep the drinking and drug use to a minimal, I have bail money so write my number on your arm and a "if found call", wear a life jacket and act like a responsible 28 year old please.
I used to not like fucking fat girls but with her gut clapping against her boobs, its like a standing ovation ever time.
Or stump rather since he's possibly large. Large penises don't have tips, just blunt ends of battering rams.
i just remember sliding through the snow and yelling i love america before puking on the oncoming cars
Why do I have the 4 of hearts in my bra?
Haha we got sick of drinking on 4 is for whores so we stole the cards...I woke up with three of them in mine
drunken problem solving at its finest
I approve. Last time I was there, I left E's room to get a drink of water. Found M sitting on the kitchen counter in his boxers hammered and eating a banana. He proceeded to feed me the rest of his banana then went to bed with the lights on. You two will be great.
Only I could host a baby shower where the cops get called.
when we woke up this morning she was missing two teeth. the front two.
Nothing says hey I wanna be your friend again like ambushing me with a dick pic
quit whining, rub some dirt on it, and lets get out there
its my penis
The bartender remember my drink from last sat. I think we just became drocals...drunk. locals.
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