***** fucked a guy with one hand last night
So. Camera broke because I tried to wash it under the sink, kristi had to take me home and I woke up to my computer showing me that I googled how t take more than one shot at a time. I'd say the night was a success.
I don't understand why we need a holiday to become more aware of boobs...
there was already a condom in her . . and it was bigger than me
New channing tatum movie.
I'll bring my vibrator.
He tried to bang a 300 pounder last night. No joke. I shotgunned a tall boy in a bar cuz the bartender didn't crack the beer. Cant wait till Nashville.
Yes, I have your ice luge mold. I'll do a prisoner exchange for the beer bong
If you already knew specifically that I was smoking a bowl in my remodeled bathroom AND THEN still wanted to initiate sexting, please proceed to the altar and marry me this instant.
He went out to smoke and when he came back I was still in the same spot naked and unable to breathe.
All I could say was, "ladies and gentlemen, THIS is why I drive 30 mins"
I just had a twenty minute discussion about endangered breed dog breeding with an Extremely drunk guy
So many questions...
I work 80 hours a week to prevent myself from just laying in bed and masturbating all day. It's a hands off strategy.
My heart says buy the granny panties, but my vagina says don't throw in the towel yet.
I'm slowly starting to accept that you have to be a sociopath to be attracted to me
just found out that my aunt grows weed. today is a good day to be me.
sooo, that video of you eating lasangna with the strobe going magically reappeared on my phone
Randomize
