Tell her to GTFO!!!!! JAI HO!!!!!
hell yes lets make some ravioli
You don't give head? I'm offended and I don't even have a cock...
I suppose drinking a cosmo at lunch alone can't look good but I mean... sometimes it's just necessary
So i realized that if i bought everything from my google search history for the past week i would have a dolphin, a wolf costume, a unicorn costume, a katana and a bullet proof vest. Not sure how the dolphin would fit in but the rest of it would end up in one awesome night or someone would die. Either way i say we do it.
He makes me want to shower. It must be love.
after the shots you kept on yelling "this is for the dreamers"
She was horrified when I asked if they had any strap on chin dildos, I was at a sex shop for gods sake must I be judged everywhere
I decided staying home, watching porn and masterbating was a much better choice than the gym. And I was right.
Honestly, if you can handle putting socks on you can handle a condom.
How about we just fuck in random places all around campus, and skip the boring relationship part?
I bought a vibrating wall dildo with my tax return. You?
do you think there's enough of the fabric you gave me to make a crop top for a cat?
Waking up next to a guy you don't remember going home with and the first thing you say is: where is my tiara? = successful birthday
Of course that's what I'm wearing. I need to find a beard to mount and ride STAT.
Randomize
