If you want her to think you're a true humanitarian, you may want to stop referring to Hands Across America as "the Ghostbusters 2 of fund raisers."
tequila makes my crab dance SOOOO much better
she must of just birthed a child cause her labia touched the floor
I love watching others lives come down to our level.
Umm I need a rain check. Long story short is I have scabies. Research it if you want. I'll tell you everything another time soon, I promise.
Dude, its flawless. what could go wrong?
Jail. That could go wrong.
I went to the haunted house just to see her - Hello new fetish!
private study room at the lib turned into byob study room. that turned into battle royale and eric impaling his leg on a pen.
Just know I'm having fun but I still have my motor functions.
Did I get stoned on a sunday afternoon and speak to someone on the phone for an hour about cats and their behaviour? Glad you asked. And yes.
He was on my bed looking at me like a sacrifice to the gods of gay sex and he's definitely a bottom. Like Jesus Christ a really, really great ass of a bottom.
Drinking hard cider in a room full of freshman girls. Never felt so secure of my manhood
I probably wouldn't
Sorry for all the snapchats, I wanted you to feel like u were in America getting plastered with me
You have not lived until you've had your brains fucked out on a broken down Tunnel of Love ride. Life is good.
I love that my family celebrates every holiday with a joint. Chanukah? Mazel-juana! Easter? What's more spring than the color green? Election day? What better way to celebrate democracy in action than medical pot?
Randomize
