Its like Laser Tag, but more fun because it ends in sex
all I remember was being half naked drinking water on my hands and knees from her dogs water bowl.
I believe that I finger-banged my way to the top of the corporate ladder.
After the second day the hotel realized I wasn't responsible enough to have a comforter, so they took it for the rest of the trip.
My penis has a 100% approval rating. He has never received a formal complaint. If you'd like to file one, you can go fuck yourself.
Why yes actually, getting stoned and reading an AARP magazine IS totally where I wanted my night to end!
No. I want to vom filet mignon and ziti bits everywhere and my body feels like I ran a cock triathalon. I feel less triumphant and more like death.
Found my bike today. On top of the garage. I'm not even going to ask myself why.
This hickey is now green and covers half my neck. I have an alien hickey. I think he thought my neck was dinner.
I'm actually drinking gin and juice out of a floridas natural carton...so if that has any indication of how I'm doing
right now I need to figure out a smart way to get an accurate picture of his dick so I know what in dealing with, right now in flying blind.
Did you or did you not grab my boob while I was making out with the foreign kid?
he brought with him gifts of cookie dough and penis. upgrading our relationship from fwb's to bf/gf was an incredibly smart merger.
my mom asked if I found my Easter basket. it's 1PM & I got home an hour ago from last night. if I'm looking for anything, it's my dignity.
the good news is I finally used my captain america waffle maker to make captain america waffles
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