I haven't had sex in so long I'll probably find some stranger, feel guilty, go w/o sex for several months and do it all over again...always something to look forward to
we are driving next to a guy driving and masturbating while looking at a naked magazine. I love LA
Come put a leash on your gf. She just challenged 8 cops to a wrestling match for 'tag team champion of the world'
i'd be lying to you if i said i didn't just bring up microsoft excel to make an alcohol budget
Well I put her head right through the headboard. Thank god the room was under her name.
she just took adderol and chased it w dog water
I have Denny's hours of operations written on the palm of my hand....not in my writing, in a girls writing, is that as good as or equal to a cell number?
Bring fortys. we have the duct tape. its onnn mothafuckaaaa
What time do you think you'll be heterosexual?
The girls danced. I drank. Then I danced cause I was drunk. Then I ripped tim's shirt off cause I'm awesome.
This isn't a because its valentines day booty call, it's a because your cock is phenomenal booty call that happens to be on valentines day..
Signs you do Molly too much. Glow sticks fallout of random articles of clothing on academic row
Well I can't be held accountable to know every which time you slid a finger here or slid a finger there. I'm way too busy getting close to climaxing to document these things.
AND I HAVE A NICE COCK! A STRIPPER TOLD ME SO IT MUST BE TRUE!
Sigh. I haven't seen a dick since August 22nd. And in case you forgot, it's January.
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