Is it normal that I have to take off my pants to get mouth stitches removed?
I just saw a Puerto Rican child between the ages of 8 and 11 with a faint mustache talking very loudly on the bluetooth in his ear about how "Skittles are played the fuck out"
do you think women who transgender themselves have the option of getting a circumcised or an uncircumcised dick?
I just took went to the bathroom and it smelt like blue curococo... I didn't flush yet so head on up if you wanna know what a good night smells like.
Someone is gonna learn how to start an IV in the morning
i wanna meet her so much more now that I know she got toed in a hottub.
its official. the only way for my hair to look good is to blow somebody
Nothing says Welcome to America than having the international house watch a sorority girl puke over the edge of the porch at 8am.
He was my shower sex Sherpa last night. And we both made it safely up the mountain.
I feel like every young boy's first wet dream is too have sex with the Pink Ranger. I am now fulfilling that dream for one man. I am a hero.
god dammit I AM NO LONGER PUTTING UP WITH YOUR HETEROSEXUALITY I QUIT
So she said she could really go for a cheeseburger and I remembered I had one in my pocket. No idea where it came from.
HIGH AS FUCK. JUST WATCHED THE TRIPPIEST VIDEO EVER. IM NOT SCARED OF PANDAS. I GOTTA GO. TRIPPIN AGAIN
I'm going to blow a ton of money on sex toys just so I can tell you to do better than them.
How was I supposed to know the accent was fake before i slept with him
Randomize
