We drank from noon till 5 am, there was adderall and nice jews involved it was just crazy
ok plan lets look hot and dance like whores.
Farmville is her only friend.
I saw the video from Saturday. So, how much did I drink for me to think I was a duck and strip my clothes?
mom came into my room and asked to borrow some condoms. We have gotten to the point where it's not awkward anymore.
uhh when the x-ray tec was moving your head you licked his hand and meowed.. i think he knew you weren't sober
Softest bathroom rug I've slept on in my life, there have been many
Do you have any idea how hard it is to hit on your nurse while getting an HIV test.
He looks like a fat version of lurch from the adams family and smells like fritos. This is not the caliber man I want pleasuring himself to the thought of me!
If you've never yelled, "fuck you ray Lewis" in front of your 87 year old grandfather you haven't lived
I remember you fighting a small man for the last of the pizza. Was there a midget in my house last night?
So why are your hands bright blue and have you seen my roommate.
Both questions will answer each other.
The language barrier was annoying .... So we just had sex. That is how you deal with not being able to chat isn't it???
I'm smoking and watching the Muppets Treasure Island. Where are you?
Something about that statement reminds me just how much of a role model you are, sis.
What's the protocol for doing tequila shots at a baseball game when you're chaperoning for a church group? You know, hypothetically.
Randomize
