I was watching truelife I'm transgendered. This tranny already got a date a week after getting a vagina. I've had a vagina my entire life and can't get a date.
I just realized that the music from spongebob is also used in real sex HBO.
I just found my coat check number in my underwear.
3 a.m. laundry plus 100 proof peppermint schnapps does not turn out well. Not only is there a puddle of detergent outside the laundry room that I spilled, but my clothes were found in the dryer wit a box of Franzia and a 40. Good thing I was too drunk to turn it on.
I'm bringing vagina and cookies. You'll be fine.
I made out with a guy because he was sitting on my coat...
Leaving your birthday party to engage in a threesome IS allowed. I checked the rule book.
I think it may of been me pulling down my pants is why she walked away.
All I really remember is thinking that the music looked like beautiful lizard waves in my head
So you get idea of what my night was like, I woke up this morning and the back of my head was orange
Batchelotette party success. I woke up on the floor in nothing but a thong, a garter and a shirt that says Just Do Me.
I have to have sex on a bidet. I'm not sure what kind, but it's reason #4 for an Italian vacation!
The cops spotted my on my walk of shame down the boardwalk and gave me a ride home. I'm starting to make a name for myself here.
did you make it home?
i'm in a room and it looks like mine :)
hahah close nuff if it isnt
So I tried to catch a rabbit in Terraria & accidentally blew it up with a grenade made of bees. Monty Python would be proud.
Randomize
