The pirates hijacked 3 more ships today!!
we need a boat to join in
Obama is on top of it we'd get killed within mins, but we'd live in legend foreva
haha omg you stole $185 from a passed out drunk indian on your porch and called the ambulance??
savin' lives aint cheap
I need a shot of tequila, and quick death
There is no way when we get home that nothing will hapen
Five Mah tais Laser and i skill have not drunk dial you
The liquor store is having an inventory reduction sale. It would be a sin not to stop and help them out.
And we all know God doesn't like sinners.
Amen.
Dude let's go to Saudi Arabia. They outlawed valentine's day. And probably love.
There are 3 pics of me on my camera, naked, wearing only an apron, scooping ice cream.
In line at the grocery store. The girl ahead of me is in a wetsuit and just bought 3 cases of beer and a bottle of vodka. I want to go where she's going...
It's a system.. i get to hook up with them and you get to play words with friends with them afterwards.
Almost screamed "GO FISH MOTHER FUCKER" at the girl I nanny today. Drunken card games shouldn't bleed into my sober life.
When Pony by ginuwine plays I pretty much just grind on the nearest penis.
This power is too much for most humans to handle safely. It's like having the nuclear launch codes, except it's my penis.
she is like a cock bee. instead of going from flower to flower she goes from cock to cock
Snorted a dorito chip for 1$. Cross that off the bucket list.
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