but it happened after you broke up with me and before we made up.
The guy in front of me in line at Starbucks looks kinda like Danica Patrick except he has a huge boner.
guy picked up a cops taser, thing shot him in the neck, he went down and pissed himself, cop started laughing and hasnt called an ambulance.
I can't go out tonight I need to save my money for important things.....like rogaine and ecstasy.
You told the waitress last night "What tip bracket do I have to be in to see your boobs"
What are the signs of a concussion? Please don't freak out.
He has to watch his girlfriends kitten. Even when she is in Vegas, her pussy keeps him from getting into mine.
Man...I want to get monumentally fucked tonight.
I was totally pumped and so was my beard
Like Is it appropriate to tell your boss you banged a guy in the back of a truck at a wedding? Probably not.
Just rode a bull topless for a free bar tap for a month
I yelled at your uterus for you.
I am putting clothes on to go find a brownie
In my experiences, brownies are better naked.
I never thought I'd be judging my neighbors sex lives before age 30 but here we are
Alcohol and video games. A solid Friday night. Even before covid
Randomize
