420 ftw
carls jr on main st. japanese tourist taking a dump in the urinal. reading a japanese newspaper and wearing a full suit.
be there in 3 mins
when your hometown is famous for abortion clinic bombings, hurricanes, and jude law's newest bastard, its probably time to move.
im trying to pick out the cookie crumbs from my adderall. it is a lot harder than it seems.
When i woke up this morning she asked me 'when did you first find out that you could see the future.' I gotta stop drinking.
We've finally come to the understanding that as long as our conversation stays stricaly sexual, we get along.
I'm quite proud of this turning point from one night stands to giving some guy a BJ to fix my car for free.
Scored tix to flower show. Do we want to go drunk on Saturday or hungover on Sunday? Only two options.
I almost spit out my drink. But only almost, because it was vodka. And you don't spit out vodka.
This is what happens when wu tang raised you
I realized I used a copy of a biography of JFK as pillow last night...
Happy Fourth.
Banana suit guy has an entourage and they're all douchebags. There is no god.
If it makes you feel any better, I'm eating a block of cheese...
Some guy named spider just bought me 5 shots
Well, if I’m not getting dick or sleep then I’m not interested.
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