All I seem to do lately is get myself off, take naked pictures and drink beer. I don't know if thats a good or bad thing.
all you kept yelling was "i'm bored and i'm sober"
I don't care how hungover you are were not listening to enya
You wrote me a letter and I cannot make out anything you wrote except the last sentence which says "tell the wolf ill meet him at sunset and that I'm sorrry"
Missing part of a tooth cos I tried to open a beer with my teeth, just saw a dude that looked like bill Cosby though so things are looking up
I feel like I've been hit by a truck, flew up and landed on a fence post that went straight through my vagina. No more vodka and sex for a while.
Hey, met you at the bar last night. You probably dont remember my name. You and your friends came back to my place, you shattered my window with your fist then dipped. Your gonna need to pay for that.
Thats where this cut came from! Thanks for piecing together the puzzle dude.
Adults smoke weed in footie pajamas man. You just gotta accept me for who I am.
Pain in my heart, regret in my vagina
Is your gma going to be okay with me passed out drunk on the ground
Dude. She came to my room in nothing but a trench coat. Took it off and said, "you like" in her Costa Rican accent. God I love college.
The cat be actin like a 2:30 am poop is the time to tell me all about her thoughts and fears in life. No bitch, this is definitely alone time.
Trusting in Jesus is not a viable birth control plan.
I'm going to make a stack of pancakes and fuck it. Right now.
Come as you are, bitch. Glitter and vodka provided.
Randomize
