Apparently they shut down a cook out cause people were selling drugsout the drive thru. Nice to be home
I haven't been this sober since birth.
Well, you're either very drunk or very high but I'll let it slide because I love any type of conversation concerning cheese.
Today as a vday present for myself I am walking in between any couples I see on campus.
No mixer. Vodka in yogurt?
she has an amazing ass but I need more beers to get past her horse face. It works out perfect becauseI can use her teeth as a bottle opener.
It's fine...I've done worse things to better people.
To be so small, the mini-horses are exceptionally aggressive. And fast. Very, very fast.
Abort! Abort! He almost bit off a finger!
Probably twitter. Never underestimate a psycho girl with wifi
thank you for extending my knowledge of the effects of vodka. speak of what happened last night and i will kill you and send your fingers to your loved ones.
Thanks for takin my cousin out last night, sorry I passed out so early
You kidding, the kids a legend. He literally killed a bottle of Jamison, made out with a girl AND her Mom at the bar, stole us slices of pizza and told the cab driver where to go in Spanish. He doesn't even live in the area. Can we keep him?
We discussed how many times we've passed out during sex. The answers may shock you.
I fell into a police barricade, a cop helped me up and asked if I've been drinking. I just looked at him and said "dude.." He proceeded to take out his handcuffs
so idk what that means but now because of me he has a police file as breaking into my apartment and sleeping in my hallway under the carpet
IT'S PERFEFT
... what?
HIS DICK. IT'S PERFECT. BYE.
Randomize
