she said it was ok for her to take her top off in the hot tub but she didn't take off her bottoms because that would be slutty
I can't wait to see her breast feed this thing
she was home schooled till college. were she learned how to give the most amazing blowjobs is still a mystery.
What happened at the top of the stairs is never to be spoken of again.
there is laundry and salad ALL OVER my car, i need context
Let's turn this shoulder dislocation into a positive. Come to the hospital, bring some beers, let's party.
No He hasn't done that since the time he came in his own eye
Yeah he's definitely gonna feel that one when he wakes up. I beat the shit out of him with that broom handle.
You said you didn't want to drink anymore so you started shooting vodka down the back of your throat using a syringe. Oh, and then you aimed it at my eye ball...vodka in the eye hurts btw.
pretty sure I just got a "sorry I have a new boyfriend" blow job. Confused, but totally ok with it.
When I was leaving this morning he gave me some candy off his floor to prove he was a nice guy... He definitely knows the way to my heart. Best one night stand ever
She wants to go furniture shopping for memorial day so we've gotta go portable
thermos full of jaeger bombs?
Affirmative
If my dick was big enough to fuck the eye of a hurricane, I would.
I want you to know. From the bottom of my heart, that you are a great friend, a beautiful person, and one of my favorite people in this world. But if you ever send me that many messages again at 4am I swear to God, I will push you in from of a fast running rhino
I’ve chosen to watch a Mercedes station wagon drive around the Austrian in the rain because it’s live sports. If that doesn’t explain 2020, I don’t know what does.
Randomize
