my house keeper must think I'm a prostitute.
Nope changed our mind. Decided your strange bacon like body odor wasn't what we want to smell tonight.
just saw a girl come out of the tanning bed room on crutches, now thats determination
How many 'remember name' entries is it inappropriate to have in one's cell phone?
Just did my hair and make up at mcdonalds so we're in the same boat.
ride him like a prized pony all the way to orgasm town.
I used the lotion his mom gave me for christmas to give him a hand job. It felt so wrong.
just saw someone in just a bathrobe not even tied shut run to the bathroom with a facefull of cum. Someone had a good night
Grandpa got a dui while riding a horse. This is what I need to live up to.
You may want to re-read your sent texts from last night. You were texting me about your "fire shits" spelled 6 different ways between 3 and 5:30 AM.
They said you bought the guy a shot and was talking about being Greek and then all of the sudden just puked all in their pitcher of beer and got kicked out of the bar.
When you put the phrases "just out of shower" and "did you get the picture" that close together, a picture of hamburger helper is not exactly what I expected to pop up.
So after taking my shirt off, he pulls my bra off like a hockey jersey. FUCKIN PRO. Guy knew what he wanted.
Well shit I mean if you get a bunch of cashed up drunk lesbians together in a casino, it's bound to go south at some point
I just want a guy who makes lots of money, has a skilled penis and the sex drive of a 22 year on Viagra. Is that too much to ask?
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