As long as they suck a good dick I don't care what fruit they have and where they have it
you kept shouting how the only tree you would hump is an elm tree because they're under populated
i got a blow job in the bathroom during intermission at the hockey game. i'm pretty sure i made Canada proud.
I just randomly started counting the number of guys that I've hooked up with that are now gay. 11.
Hey. Can you be so hung over that you get a rash?
bro, sorry for: trying to put you on fire yesterday, telling the bouncer that it was you that broke the bottles, and to have slept with your sister.
You then proceeded to tell me how good of a cook you were and put raw cookie dough in the champagne.
You were sitting in the tub, clothed, squirting my KY all over yourself. You said "it's warm." then passed out.
On a scale of 1-10 how seriously are we considering being sugar babies?
I'm about a 7.95
I also like to call Halloween "Mystery Fuck Day"
Literally just had a girl put her street name into my phone. Yeah.
Just had my first american. He tasted like freedom.
your were asleep with people making out on top of you. you didn't even look bothered by it.
He's mad about lube? You know what, don't even. I'm not in the proper mindset to discuss lube.
It was great. We stayed up all night talking about objects he'd put in his theoretical vagina.
Randomize