In hindsight, i should have predicted that a drink called the 'rocky mountain bear fucker' would not end in a pleasant experience
You were peeing on yourself thinking it was the sprinkler in your yard
Where'd you guys get the alcohol from?
Oh. Some homeless guy we picked up from I-70. He bought us $400 worth of alcohol in exchange for a shower.
...... wtf.
We could be the people that go there! Shuffleboard n shit. Meet strippers.
You had me at shuffleboard and strippers
you told that cab driver that when the 3 of us come togehter it means happiness and love
that's right. bitches got laser pointers. let's fuck shit up
HIV testing and a light brunch. Sounds like a great way to spend Christmas Eve.
Maybe you'll have a Christmas miracle
It turned from Netflix and chill to cringeworthy YouTube videos and chill. At least he's honest.
You okay? Last night you climbed through my window and demanded I take shots with you and when I refused you took a piss in my front yard.
that's your fault. you refused to take shots with me.
We found out if you get Ben high but stay sober yourself he is an AWESOME cook. You need to get your ass down here, this goes against everything I know to be real.
I should've negotiated that before I sat on his face.
If you dont get laid dressed as Woody Harrelson in Zombieland, I have lost all faith in the men of nw Indiana.
I was so high I forgot how to swallow food, and I just kept thinking "thank god its just mashed potatoes, they'll go down eventually"
I will not abuse the gift that was given to me
You were given a vagina and you abuse that pretty hard
is it sad that the highlight of my saturday night was waiting till 3 in the morning to hear about your saturday night?
Randomize
