Hey it's Austin.
I am not drunk enough for this conversation.
Note to self: When getting ready to leave with a kid in a wheelchair don't say Let's roll
I tried making the sex a little better this time so right before I blew I yelled "ready or not here I come!"
This titty bar has wifi. I just did FaceTime stage side
his dick makes me think maybe a monogamous relationship forever is possible.
I found a ladder. I don't know where I am. Gonna climb it. I feel like aladin
After i black out, be a good friend and point me to the direction of a girl with daddy issues, any girl would do just fine
They should have to wear some identification that warns you to stay away. Like one of those cones dogs wear to keep them from biting stitches. CONE OF SHAME.
You don't put off sexcapades. Life lesson #1.
Please just fuck her. She's new to LA and doesn't know anyone nice.
There just aren't enough words in the English language to convey my deep and abiding love of your cock. So I am beefing up on my Portuguese.
My wife ladies and gentlemen! Love ya babe.
so today, i decided to say "fuck it" to mental stability, take a klonopin and wear a blanket toga. New Girl is on Netflix, nothing could go wrong.
well he said my boobs made him believe in love at first sight so that's cool
What, so now you are his nutritionist and his fuck buddy?
Straight boys are literally imbeciles. If Darwinism doesn’t get them female rage will.
Randomize
