We will have to stop frequently for food, stretching legs, interesting things on the side of the road, and sex. So you might as well eat.
omg my older sister has been googling "how do I know if I've had an orgasm?" and "bj tips". the family laptop is not meant for this...
As it turns out, drunk trust falling that guy at the top of the waterslide didn't really work out for anyone..
dude you cant keep breaking into my house just to raid my fridge.. especially at 3AM.
Johns diaper came in the mail. He's freaking out thinking there's some conspiracy going on since he sharted on the drive home from st. Louis
I have mastered the 3 minute room cleaning drill in preparation for the nights possible slam-piece
Hes drunk and dancing naked. I can hear his dick smacking his legs from the next room.
Do you know anyone with a stuffed cougar? I want one for a self portrait to hang in my house. A bobcat or lynx might work too.
YES. YOU ARE GOING TO HAVE SEX WITH ME WHILE I SING LES MIS.
He stole all of his parent's vodka WHILE they were in the room, and then opened the window and snuck out. I was watching from my truck
My dad just saw me take dirty one night stand underwear out of my purse. I'm willing to admit I have a problem
I would like to formally reclaim my title of a turn up queen.
This text constitutes a formal request for sexual congress under the terms of our Relationship Agreement.
I put purple lights under my bed and asked him if he wanted to fuck in a spaceship.
It doesn't count as "finding the lesbian" if you fuck a straight girl!
Randomize
