fix you gags fore go to garrits please? !!!!!!!
What does that mean?
How when the cu k dos I yet u
Focus
I feel like your standards for women is like rent-a-centers standards for credit.
Just violated the laws of fuck-buddyship and talked to him about my personal life. I don't like it.
he gave me a new purse full of weed and five boxes of samoas for my birthday. best boyfriend ever.
She started ignoring us once we told her we were out to celebrate your abortion. Who knew strippers could be judgemental?
Just abandoned him for a bowl of soup and the living room floor...hope the window replacement guys don't get a show..I miss you!
Shoot me. I need tickles, a drink, sushi and a handy
Order is debatable
81 degrees in april.... Thinking margaritacicles, you in?
I get that he's ugly and I deserve better but I will still beat up the girls he hangs out with.
I shouldn't be that hard, but i cant exactly put "a guy to tie me up and fuck me and then brush my hair" in my dating profile
It was Thanksgiving sex. I was thankful for it. Need I say more?
I woke up missing my shoes and my left eyebrow. MY. EYEBROW.
But on a side note, how the fuck do you "accidentally " get peed on
He updated Facebook... "Got a new phone today." WHAT ABOUT THE FUCKING KID YOU HAD?!
I got home and he was wearing a suit. He said he reason was because it was shirt and tie Saturday and that he won't change until midnight. He then proceeded to answer the door in a British accent.
Randomize
