Every time I find out someone else from high school got pregnant accidentally, I want to declare victory over them.
ok, his religious views on facebook are madonna lyrics. we no longer have to wonder about his sexuality.
He asked me how my body knew that a month was up when it was time for my period.
oh my god, there is an imprint from the nuva ring in the christmas card my mom sent me. merry christmas.
I think he just gave me the 'I used to sleep with your sister' discount
You picked up her frozen vom puddle and threw it like a frisbee.
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
Things I had in my bed when I woke up: an avocado, a toilet brush, and a note that says thanks but no thanks with the number of taco bell on it. WHAT DID I DRINK?
Im gonna wear a random assortment of things for Halloween, guy with the most creative answer gets laid
You are not going to get a pat on the back from me for not fucking that 40 year old again.
I was going to do a cardio thing but then tacos.
I've had sex near too many of the blankets to let our parents touch them like this
I'm here. Help me get the salsa and bong inside.
What the hell happened to the sandwich meat I just bought?
After you smoked, you made 8 ham sandwiches.
Guess that explains the mysterious disappearance of the bread...
Bitch got stabbed in the eye. With a fork. Wait for it... At church. I was the only one at a party interested in her story. Only in the south
Randomize
