i met him on craigslist. and no i'm not a hooker.
If she catches me sniffing the seat of her office chair again, she's either going to fire me or fuck me
Omg. Get me out of here. Someone is playing michelle branch.
we should hire that guy that makes pancakes that we met last weekend for our next party. He can feed us, and regulate!
Her mom walked into the garage as we were smoking a kush blunt with sombreros on.
DONT EVER DUNK OREOS INTO WINE . NEVER
I am on a roof. I'm not sure which one, or why, or how, but I am on a roof and you should come get me. I can see info classrooms!
Nothing bonds a father and daughter like washing her puke off the front steps
They are stoned and trying to learn sign language together. It's like watching a chimp waving at itself in a mirror.
Relaxed was like phase 1 of this phase 7 high
I think I'd be more bothered by his cross dressing if I wasn't secretly into women..,
There is absolutely a 0% chance my hips will make it out of this twerking business fully functional
Sorry my phone died because I decided charging my vibrator was way more important
Do you think I could use my teacher of month Award to get free drinks?
Since when is my clitoris pierced?
Randomize
