God help me. Come pick me up. The guy told me this is not a hotel and i had to leave.
Im watching he's just not that into you, eating way too much pizza, and feeling very single.
I shagged another guy with one ball last night. Are there really that many dudes with one nut in la or am I just a magnet for prostetic testes?
We aren't going to mix hockey and sex texts tonight.
I totally agree. all sexting is on hold till after the games over.
Playoffs. This shit is serious.
When I realized it was a dog, and I still had a boner, it was awkward.
Everytime I see a couple on campus walking and holding hands I just want to yell he's gonna lie!
Missing a small section of hand. Hope your night is going better
I say we start a new tradition. I came up with it all by myself. It's called work out, lay out, black out
I JUST SEARCHED GINGER COCK ON TUMBLR AND THEY'RE ALL REALLY WELL HUNG? I'M CRYING. IS THIS HOW GINGERS KEEP REPRODUCING?
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU?
My horseshoe mustache feels at home at this bar.
I was figuring I'd break up with her after work, but before Taco Tuesday
Dude I'm hungover as fuck in a bed in Baltimore with another man... I don't think I can make it.
I slept like a rock because of your dick. I'll thank him personally later.
We were trying to organize all the customers to hold a window pickle race. as of 10:37 pm last night we are no longer allowed in our McDonalds.
hey, cheif big dick, where the fuck are my panties.
Randomize
