Myspace is for pedophiles and tweakers in the 818 trying to hook up. I always forget theres music there too
i just hope all the shady shit stops so i can let him into my pants
he poured tabasco sauce in my vag.. I'm still having a hard time going to the bathroom.
I'm babysitting and we're watching Barney and I don't understand why Barney can magically make band hats appear but he makes them make shitty ass instruments.
Barney's a jerk
and i was just like oh shit i'm getting felt up by a 15 year old
Hypothetically, how much legal trouble do you think i will be in for stealing someone's dog?
She just sent me videos of her blowing my little bro and my best friend... worst. ex. ever.
I wonder if they'd let me siphon the gas out my car before they impound it
im eating mac and cheese with a makeup brush. there is wayyyyy too much wrong with this night.
Send me another check for the tickets. I scratched out "anal wax" and now the bank won't take it.
So many gingers... It's like a beacon went out that said "this one is ok with red hair"
Waking up in a NH rest stop and reading through my texts is definitely a familiar low
Then when he got home he face timed me and showed me his balls
I need to hire someone full-time to slap food and dick away from me.
He started praying immediately after we hooked up, condom on and everything.
Randomize