It's what's on the inside that counts(972): They probably have big open vaginas so the inside is no good
How can something that makes you feel so good one day make you feel so bad the next?
Alcohol?
Sex with a fat chick.
is it bad if my mug shot looks better than my profile picture?
He woke me up at 4am just to lick my nipple. Then he talked in his sleep for 20 minutes about the sex we just had. I think it's safe to say he's a weird one, but I dont care cuz he fucks like a champ.
I'm really tired of your booty call eating my fruity pebbles.
I still love him regardless of his misguided forays into heterosexuality
Just found out drinking 6 trays of random shots makes me wake up on a club toilet with my underwear and jeans around my ankles
His penis has been a bonding mechanism beyond comparison.
He wants me to hook up with his fiance while he watches. Text you later with how it goes.
I was so drugged up it was amazing, I felt like a dinosaur "because I enjoyed spinach, and I got apple juice and only dinosaurs get apple juice" according to me the day of, and last night I felt like a rocket ship
woke up to a family dragging me under their beach umbrella, they poured water on me bc they "thought I was dead" then fed me quesadillas and nursed me back to health... gotta love Cabo
Yeah when I texted her last night the only response I got was "stoned eating cobbler."
Thanks for reminding me of all the hookups my brain has been trying to suppress...
That's what friends are foooooooor!
My favorite part was when you kept telling everyone you were being "green" by drinking straight out of the bottle so u weren't wasting a cup.
The thing about online classes is the prof can't tell this mug is full of beer.
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