She had just swallowed, of course i didnt kiss her goodbye
Wasn't she moving abroad?
Are you really going to debate this?
Dating my ex's drug dealer.. best. revenge. ever.
airport. 106 proof japanese liquor. 4 little travel size containers. im proud to be smarter than the average american.
i need to know the scientific term for a guy's taint so i can explain what i did last night.
It's hard to believe so much cum came out of such a small penis.
She sucked my dick when I had a concussion. It was the coolest feeling ever but the doctor said it was a bad idea. He's obviously gay.
First off, get on bc solely in preperation for this event. Second, as my little sister you have a lot of whore to live up to.
She got turned on by my fanny pack full of condoms. I can't believe you said it was a bad idea to wear it to the party.
If there's so much of a hint of a whisper from somebody I didn't tell personally, I will cut off your balls with a chainsaw, cauterize the wound with a flaming rusty spoon, feed your balls to your dog, and feed them to you when he shits them out, capiche?
I'm sad that I feel like I need to temporarily change your name in my phone from Smashley until you have the baby and can be unsober with us again.
she's fucked both of my roommates but not me. i feel like I'm not part of the group anymore
I'm naked on my couch and just ate a chip that was in my belly button.. my 20s have been weird.
You just wait. When you see me foam roll naked, you're going to lose your mind.
Did I tell you about my dream that I got handed a $100 and my vagina dissolved it? I think it wants me to not be a whore anymore.
Remind me to tell you about this weekend with them. It was the least fun I have ever had drinking. And I have thrown up pork and beer through my nose on the side of the freeway.
Randomize
